Hey there, Mama. You seem frustrated, possibly even mildly concerned. How do I know? Well, let’s just say I’ve been in your shoes before. The shoes you put on to go on a hunt for information about why you are having PMS while nursing when you have not had your first postpartum period yet.
Do you know why I’m writing this post? First of all, because I have previous experience with PMS while nursing. My first post on the topic was wildly popular (check that one out here). And the feedback in the comments on that post tells me most women in this situation are having the same problem I had: There is no information to be found on this topic!
Also, I am currently in my second go-round, so I have a few more words of wisdom to share with you.
But most importantly, I am writing this post because I want you to know that you don’t have to be anxious about PMS while nursing. The fact that you are experiencing hormone overload for days or weeks on end or off and on for months without a period can be completely normal while breastfeeding.
So stick around, Mama. Grab yourself a cup of coffee or tea and a piece of chocolate and let’s have a girl talk.
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Please note that I am not a medical professional and nothing in this post is meant to be medical advice. Please speak with your OBGYN or primary care provider about any hormone, menstruation, pregnancy or breastfeeding concerns you have.
My First Experience with PMS While Nursing
My first experience with PMS while nursing was pretty frustrating. After I had my first daughter, we were hoping to have another child as soon as possible. But my daughter made sure that was not even a possibility for 2 1/2 years. She nursed so often for the first 19 months of her life that my body probably thought I had an eternal newborn.
Read about what ecological breastfeeding is and why some moms do it.
But there were some false hope occasions during those 19 months when my body temporarily thought it was time to get the baby-production line back up and running. This happened when I hadn’t nursed her for several hours longer than normal. If it was only a one- or two-day thing, my body would simply have a “phantom” period with all the symptoms except the bleeding and then go back to a normal, cycle-free hormonal state.
This was incredibly discouraging at the time. I would be so excited that maybe we were about to be able to try for another child. But once my body realized that what it thought was weaning was actually a false alarm, it would halt all preparations to return to a fertile state.
When my daughter finally did suddenly decrease her nursing permanently, my hormones took a huge hit. It was rough for the first few days after she went from nursing ever hour and half to going 5 hours between nursing sessions. It definitely sent a clear message to my body that my baby was growing up and did not need me to be her everything anymore.
My body got the message: Time to get the baby factory up and running again! But after roughly 2 1/2 years without a period (and because I was still breastfeeding part-time), it took some time for my body to prep the factory before it could resume production. To be more specific, it took nine months for me to have a real cycle again after day-weaning my daughter.
There were a lot of hormonal ups and downs during those nine months. But no real, true period until things finally calmed down and straightened out with my hormones. Then I finally had a period. A normal, complete period.
That was 3 1/2 years ago and a lot has happened since then. I got pregnant on my second postpartum cycle 2 1/2 years after my first daughter was born. But, unfortunately, that pregnancy did not turn out how we hoped. Neither did the next one. Or the next one.
Read about my complete molar pregnancy and my chemical pregnancies.
But finally, I had a successful pregnancy. Possibly because of using maca before and during my pregnancy (but more on the benefits of maca in a future post). We finally had our second child five years after our first. That was a year ago.
And now, I have some more wisdom to share with you about PMS while nursing in the absence of a period.
My Second Experience with PMS While Nursing
I’ve been experiencing PMS while nursing during this second round of breastfeeding as well. Only this time, I am not anxiously awaiting my body’s return to fertility. So I am much more level-headed about the whole experience.
Well, at least when I’m not experiencing the hormonal hurricane brought on by the ominous “phantom” PMS. Who can be level-headed when your body preps and fusses over an upcoming supposed visit from Aunt Flo?
With my second baby, things have been different with breastfeeding. Partly because she’s just a different child and has not been as needy as my first. And partly because she was born with a heart defect that led to the need for placement of a feeding tube at 3 1/2 months old.
Read why my baby has holes in her heart.
Consequently, it has been easier to prolong the stretches between nursing sessions with her as necessary for various reasons related to her medical condition. And, as a natural result of this, I have already experienced PMS through times of longer breastfeeding abstinence during her first year of life.
So since the research on this topic appears to be almost non-existent, allow me to share with you what I have learned from my own body. Basically, any time I go longer than normal without nursing my baby, my body gets a little memo that says, “Get ready, I think it might be time to resume production soon!”
If I continue to go longer stretches between nursing for an indefinite amount of time, my body will ultimately decide that this is for real. My baby is growing up and no longer needs my body to be focused solely on her. As I mentioned above, this is what happened with my first daughter when I day-weaned her and maintained those longer periods between feeds.
And I am having a similar experience with my second daughter. About five or six months ago, I was trying to night wean her in an attempt to lessen her nighttime and morning vomiting.
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I was going about 8 hours each night without nursing for probably close to a week. In response, my body experienced a clear hormonal shift, although not as severe as what I experienced when I day-weaned my first daughter.
Read what my hormones went through during the day-weaning process.
I did eventually go back to nursing her at night because of her discomfort from acid reflux. But the length of time during which we were doing longer stretches may have been enough to trigger a permanent response from my body.
I also normally go longer periods during the day without nursing her than I did with my older daughter at this age. So I’m very likely to see my cycle sooner than I did the first time around. It seems my body makes a habit of doing the exact opposite of what I want it to.
Since that initial hormonal shift when I was not nursing at night, I have continued to have intermittent, less severe and random PMS symptoms. This is very similar to what happened with partially weaning my first daughter during the course of those 9 months before I had a real cycle.
Read what the first 8 months after day-weaning my first daughter were like for my hormones.
On the other hand, it is possible that my body is just thoroughly confused by the fact that I sort of partially weaned … but then didn’t. Only time will tell what all this hormonal craziness means for my cycle.
What Dr. Google Says About PMS While Nursing
So here you are. Doing what we all do with an apologetic smile at our doctor: Searching Dr. Google for the answers to your health questions. And what exactly does Dr. Google have to say about PMS while nursing without a period?
Well … not much. There is an amazing lack of medical information about this topic. But I sure have found plenty of mom discussion forums on this confusing situation. There are many breastfeeding mamas out there wondering why they are PMSing for a week without the relief of a period at the end. And the only answers they get are from other moms experiencing the same thing.
I did find this one article discussing phantom periods, but it gives every reason except nursing for experiencing all of the symptoms of a period without the bleeding. I also found this article which very briefly touches on the fact that some breastfeeding women experience PMS symptoms during the months leading up to their cycle returning postpartum. Kelly Mom also briefly mentions the same thing.
But that’s why you are here, isn’t it? Because you finally found an article dedicated specifically to PMS while nursing in the absence of a cycle. Amidst a sea of inapplicable articles Google returned when you hit that search button. You found the one. The article that finally addresses this topic on which the available information is as phantom as your period.
So you know I’ve got the answer for you. You know I have the cure. You know I’m going to give you the formula for surviving this thing without going completely crazy. Well, hold on to your seat, because here it comes …
Have Patience While You Wait
How anticlimactic was that? I know what you are thinking:
Have patience? Seriously? Do you have any idea how irritable I have been with everybody and everything? Do you know how annoying these cramps are? Do you know how badly I want another child? Do you know how frustrating it is to just do nothing and wait?
I get it. I really do. It’s frustrating to feel like your internal clock isn’t ticking correctly. It’s so deflating to hope only to be disappointed when you are waiting for the opportunity to conceive again. Trust me, I understand all of these things all too well.
Read about the challenges of trying to conceive while breastfeeding.
My first time around was full of unfulfilled hope and waiting for an eternity to feel “normal” again and be able to try for another baby. It was so hard and incredibly frustrating. But I’ve learned a lot since then.
I’ve learned you can’t control when you will be fertile again. I’ve learned that when you are fertile, you can’t control when you will get pregnant. I’ve learned that when you are pregnant, you can’t control the outcome of the pregnancy. I’ve learned that when you have a successful pregnancy, you can’t control whether or not you and your baby will be perfectly healthy and happy.
I’ve learned not to be in a rush. I’ve learned I don’t have to be in control because someone wiser already is. I’ve learned there is a plan for everything and that plan often requires time and events we do not expect. I’ve learned that I always get through it. No matter how long the wait or how difficult the challenge.
You will get through this too, Mama. Go grab yourself another piece of chocolate, focus on things you love to do and enjoy where your family and your life are at right now. You never know what is ahead but you know the abundance of blessings you already have.
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