When I got pregnant with my daughter, I was overwhelmed by how much there was to figure out and how many decisions there were to make. Fortunately, God gives mamas roughly eight months to educate ourselves before we graduate to parenthood.
If you are pregnant, you have probably already figured out that a lot of the educational focus you have is on preparing for labor. There is so much to learn about that part of motherhood alone!
And if you’re planning to have a natural birth, there are a lot of things you have to actively educate yourself about beyond what you will learn in the labor and delivery class you take at your hospital.
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My own journey to natural birth was very gradual and began with my first pregnancy which resulted in miscarriage (read that story here). It wasn’t until I began reading a book recommended by my midwife – “Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth” by Ina May Gaskin – late in my first trimester that I fully realized I wanted a natural birth.
Over the ensuing months, I became passionate about having a natural birth and gradually built up a team of natural birth supporters around me, blocking out any opportunities to hear someone tell me I wouldn’t be able to do it.
My team consisted of the following supportive sources:
- Loved Ones (my husband, my mom, and a friend who has had several natural births).
- Care Providers (my midwife and chiropractor)
- Pro-Natural-Birth Hospital (the environment and the nurses)
- Doula
- Natural Birth Stories (there are a ton in the book mentioned above as well as limitless stories and YouTube videos online)
In my opinion, this entire team is responsible for giving me the courage to prepare for a birth without medicated pain relief and with as few interventions as possible. If you are planning to have a natural birth, I cannot stress enough how important all of these elements were to having a peaceful, unpressured birth experience.
Please note that I am not a medical professional and nothing in this post is meant to be medical advice.
Loved Ones
There is no question that every woman preparing for a baby needs the support of loved ones who agree with her own beliefs regarding pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, and how to care for a baby. This is especially true when it comes to planning a natural birth.
For example, if you believe breastfeeding is best for your baby but your support system does not and you are being discouraged from doing it, it will be SO much harder to stick with it even though it is natural, good for you and baby, and completely doable.
It is the same for having a natural birth. It IS completely doable to have a natural birth, but if everyone around you is talking about how impossible it sounds or what a bad idea it is, your view on birth is going to be effected.
For this reason, I did not broadcast the fact that I was planning to have a natural birth. The people closest to me knew, of course, but I did not generally volunteer this information to anyone else, because I didn’t want to hear the negativity that would inevitably come out of people’s well-meaning mouths.
The following statements are what I mean by negativity:
- “Wow, you are brave!”
- “You must have a high pain tolerance.”
- “Ha, that’s what I wanted until I was in labor.”
- “Well, that’s a good goal to have, but if you feel like you need it, don’t be afraid to ask for the epidural.”
- “Why do you want to put yourself through the torture?”
Statements such as these instill a tiny piece of doubt in our minds no matter how hard we try not to be effected by them. I know that every woman has a different experience with birth and some experience more pain than others. But I am a firm believer that how we view birth ahead of time partially dictates how we experience it.
I kept asking myself throughout labor if I was even tempted to get an epidural, and you know what? I never was! But I really think that if I hadn’t prepared for a natural birth the way I did, I might have gotten one anyway simply because it was the expected thing to do.
My labor was not as painful as I thought it was going to be. I had pain, but it was not the worst pain I could possibly imagine a human being going through like I was expecting. It was manageable.
But if I didn’t fill my mind with the belief that my body was designed to do this and that it is perfectly capable of birthing a baby without augmentation or pain relief, I may have caved to one or both of those things during my 37-hour labor out of fear that my body needed “help” to compete labor in a “safe” way.
Do yourself a huge favor. Surround yourself with natural birth supporters and don’t tell the pro-epidural medical interventionists that you are planning a natural birth. Just don’t. Now is not the time to try to win a debate on medicine versus nature.
Care Providers
It can be easy to get stuck with a care provider who does not agree with your natural preferences simply because you have a history with him or her or because you don’t know where to look to find someone better.
But it is essential to have a doctor or midwife who is on board with how you want to do labor as well as after-birth care and medical interventions you may or may not want for your baby.
The last thing you need during the intensity of labor is a doctor getting angry with you because you won’t accept medical pain relief (yes, this really happens to some women). Wouldn’t you rather have a doctor or midwife who believes you are capable of delivering a baby with as little medical intervention as possible and who is cheering you on?
You will also find that a natural-birth-friendly care provider can provide you with more information about other resources to help you prepare for your unmedicated birth. Several of the (extremely) helpful resources I utilized during my pregnancy were recommended by my midwife.
Pro-Natural-Birth Hospital
I was so incredibly blessed to have a hospital that is known in our area for catering to natural births. They had all the tools to offer a laboring women for natural pain management, continuous movement, and relaxation.
But even more important than the tools and facility itself were the nurses. They were phenomenal! They did not try to talk me into anything I said I didn’t want.
During our pre-registration, as we were filling out the paperwork with the nurse, she explained that since I did not want an epidural, they would never offer me one unless I asked for it. She also asked for our preferences on which after-birth standard procedures we did or did not want done on our baby.
I know we were SO blessed to have this hospital, and I’m sure there are not many out there that are like this. However, if you cannot find a hospital that is supportive of natural birth, you can also look into using a birth center or even having a home birth!
Doula
A lot of people don’t understand the purpose of a doula. I did not understand the purpose either when I first read about the idea of hiring a woman to sit through labor with me. But because having a doula increases your chances of having a successful natural birth, I was instantly interested.
Having a doula present really can have a significant impact on your birth experience. Studies have shown that women in labor who were randomly assigned a doula had less pain and were less likely to get an epidural than the women who were not assigned a doula – this was regardless of whether or not they were planning on having a natural birth (Source).
But besides increasing your chances for an unmedicated birth, a doula can also make the whole labor process easier on you and the daddy-to-be.
One of the main ways my doula helped during my labor was by simply being there ALL the time for me. During the 28 hours she was by my side (including the two hours she stayed after my daughter’s birth to feed me and help me figure out how to breastfeed), I think she took one 15 minute break.
This was amazing because it allowed my husband to leave to eat, use the restroom, etc. without leaving me to labor alone. I literally was never alone throughout labor unless I was in the restroom.
You could also just have an extra support person with you to accomplish this goal as well, especially if you can’t spend the money on a doula (last I knew, they can range anywhere from $300-$1000).
A doula will have knowledge and experience your average loved one probably won’t, but you can reap some of the same benefits as having a doula by simply having the additional encouragement of a friend or family member.
I had a couple of reasons for wanting a doula instead of a family member. First, I am a very modest person and can’t quite stomach the thought of a family member seeing me in my most vulnerable, uncovered state.
Second, I wanted to have someone who would tirelessly and empathetically support me without being swayed by personal emotions.
My doula was so sweet and caring, but we didn’t know each other outside of the arena of my pregnancy and birth, so I didn’t have to worry about her making suggestions or pressuring me to do something out of a desire to stop my pain because it was too hard for her to see me that way.
Is having a doula the only way to have a successful natural birth? No. But having a doula made the birth experience easier and more relaxed for both me and my husband.
Natural Birth Stories
I love reading birth stories! To me, each and every story of a mother’s journey through labor to meet her little baby for the first time is so exciting.
This was especially true of natural birth stories while I was preparing for my own natural birth. Reading and watching women successfully labor and give birth without medicinal pain relief and little or no medical interventions inspired me on a regular basis that I could do it too.
Seeing the diverse ways in which labor can progress for different women and different pregnancies was also very beneficial. Since you can’t know what your labor is going to be like ahead of time, being familiar with as many possibilities as you have time to learn about is sometimes the best way to prepare.
I read natural birth stories online, watched real natural births on youtube and read Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin. This book is amazing because not only does it have lots of natural birth stories, it also has information and science behind why natural birth is doable and so much better for your body and your baby.
In the real life birth stories I read, there were so many different kinds of labor. Some women struggled to resist getting an epidural while others never felt they needed one. Some women’s labors lasted days while others were only three hours long.
Some women loved and found relief in pushing while others hated or were confused by it. Some women tore, bled, and were exhausted at the end while others were energised by the experience.
Despite the wide range of experiences, the overriding theme that almost every woman seemed to agree on was that having a natural birth was a life-changing and beautiful experience. And every time I read another story, it fueled my desire to give birth naturally.
Some women use birth affirmations before and during labor to create and maintain a positive view of what their body is doing. For me, these birth stories were kind of like affirmations because they reaffirmed over and over that natural birth is doable, safe, and amazing.
And you know what? My labor and delivery was indeed doable, safe, and absolutely amazing! Yours will be too if you believe it will be and prepare yourself (and your spouse) throughout pregnancy.
The One Thing You Need to Know
Preparation is really important for any birth, but there is just one simple thing you need to know and believe to be capable of giving birth naturally: Your body knows how to do labor.
Natural birth is not some invention of crunchy moms. It’s the way women have been giving birth since the beginning of time.
Nowadays, we have so much medical technology – which is lifesaving in some situations. But unfortunately, medical interventions are overused in a lot of perfectly healthy birthing situations.
If you want a natural birth and do not have any complications with your pregnancy, do not get sucked into the lie that you “need” medical pain relief or assistance to get through labor. Surround yourself with support to continuously feed your belief in what your body is capable of accomplishing all in its own.
Did you have a natural birth? What was most beneficial to you in preparing for labor? Share your thoughts in the comments!
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